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RED Today was mostly blue with mare’s tails clouds – There wasn’t much red except there - in the corners of the shadows… Yesterday was blue with a tinge of green – no red - or at least not enough to turn blue to purple or green to brown… Tonight is a little red… but not more than I can tolerate. I don’t turn away from red now – I used to when it was blinding - with shiny blades that cut… My fear welcomes red… My ears need to see - my eyes need to hear… My palette has many colors – including red.
September 2007 - Amy R. Handford |
EDGES We all have edges. My edges are razor wire , it glistens and sparkles in the light. My edges have a purpose – To cut me when I reach out; To cut you when you reach in.
October 2007 - Amy R. Handford
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Whispers Sometimes hissing - as acid cuts through metal; Leaving scars from the molten gold.
September 2007 - Amy R. Handford
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Full Price Half price Sale price Low price My price Your price How much?
October 2007 - Amy R. Handford
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You Said You’d Call You said you’d call… My psyche knows what that means. When I answer, my resentment scars will be sliced open again. The exposed raw flesh will become a receptacle for your negative energy. My psyche knows what it means… when I don’t answer your call, my scars will harden and become a protective skin.
December 2007 - Amy R. Handford
If… If – is the word that forms the most powerful, mind-altering thoughts and feelings in my life. If – I turn the f upside down, it forms a hook that will drown me in denial. If – keeps me a prisoner in this hollow skull that houses my brain. If – makes touching reality impossible with my phantom hands. If – causes me to lose time while I wait in a fourth dimension for events that exist only in the shadows.
Amy R. Handford February, 2008 Fear I’m frozen… immobile My insides are snakes that writhe and hiss. I want to run but, I’m frozen. The cage door is shut. I can open it, but I’m frozen. The heat comes on , yet I’m shaking inside. I’m frozen. I hold tightly, hoping to break. I can’t see even if I look. I’m frozen. I need to touch my inner light… If I stop, and feel without, I will be.
Amy R. Handford February, 2008
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Ice I must move quickly… My spirit woman tells me this. The ice creaks and moans with a harsh voice. I must move quickly now- the cracks widen. When I look down, I see a face staring up - suspended in the ice of this dead sea. With one misstep, I too will sink- frozen and staring up from the dark ice. I must move quickly now and not look down. My spirit woman tells me this. My feet are numb and I don’t feel the nails of the hand from the ice as they pierce my skin; The wounds they inflict are shallow but deep enough to deliver the freezing venom to my blood stream. I must move quickly now and not look down. My spirit woman tells me this. If I stop, the venom will turn to shards of ice and will reach my heart - replacing blood with the coldness of fear. My eyes will blur and the treacherous ice will seem safe. My ears will no longer hear the cracking and moaning of the ice but a quieter, softer dull sound of numbness. I must move quickly now and not look down. My spirit woman tells me this. If I stop to rest, my life will become suspended, entombed and frozen in the ice underneath my feet. I must listen. I must move quickly now and not look down. My spirit woman tells me this.
Amy R. Handford January 2008
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